31 July 2014

Twigs and Willows and the Green That Sings

Listening to Kaito - Run Through the Road in the Fog, from Until the End of Time
Resolving to get Aryeh weaned from nursing to sleep.

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two photos copyright alana dakos!

Naturally, I've selected a sweater to do for the Very Shannon Summer Sweater KAL, which starts today. I bought the yarn a month or so ago in anticipation, but alas... I can't start knitting until next Tuesday night, the end of the Nine Days of mourning on the Jewish calendar. I suppose technically I could knit this week, but it's better to be stringent. Above is the pattern I selected, the Twigs and Willows cardigan by Alana Dakos of Never Not Knitting. Below is the wooly beauty I chose at Natural Stitches.

Little hint of yellow, variegated mossy green tones... I love. Originally I grabbed the Blue Moon BFL Sport in this colorway, The Green That Sings, but it just didn't feel as glorious as the Targhee did. Honestly, I did prefer the color of the BFL! But alas, not all goes as planned! So Targhee Worsted it is! I would have had to adjust my gauge a lot more anyway, I suppose. 

Two skeins of this beauty and I'm set. But can you imagine... winding that 616 yards TIMES TWO by hand? I could not, so I took their complementary winding of the first skein. Let me say... my dainty little wisp of an arm will be falling off when it comes time to wind that second skein at home! Look at the size of that yarn cake! I will take a picture of it next to my head or in my hand or something for a true comparison, but mark my words, it's massive! 

30 July 2014

Nostalgia and magic

Listening to Hammock - Gold Star Mothers, from Maybe They Will Sing For Us
Reading Death Comes to Pemberley by P.D. James
Resolved to fill this empty page.

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Sometimes a day starts off on the wrong foot, but in the end there can be simple joy. Today was one of those days. The kids were having an iffy morning, Aryeh screamed his head off for an undefinable reason as week walked through a shop (this doesn't happen often so I was kind of just trying to coast through the stress, screams, and stares of passerby's.) Kids were either falling asleep in the car at inopportune times or whining about nothing and everything. But after I picked up the Mister, I asked if I could have a little time off.

Off I drove to the bookstore and browsed, without stress. Rarely do I get such a treat! There was an air of things starting to turn toward a more positive direction and I decided to embrace it as best I could, shaking the doldrums away. When I got home, I gifted Aviva with her very first school backpack and she was ecstatic. Obviously she went around the house stuffing it with "school" like things. We sat down to watch "My Neighbor, Totoro" together. She told me how she wanted to be a mommy like me someday and that she would never want her children to runaway like Mei did because that would make mommies sad (the four year old runs off in the movie). There was magic in the movie, charming, bizarre scenes of trees growing on the spot and creatures flying on spinning tops, tears and summer rain, forest friends and all manner of things I love.

I kept tearing up while watching the film because these are the kind of memories I always said I wanted to give my children and that I used to try to give them. But somewhere along the way, I got lost in a cycle of stress and anxiety where the kids were concerned.

Shortly after the film, I happened across the blog gingerlillytea for the first time. I purchased a copy of Artful Blogging while perusing the crafty magazines at the bookstore. So many pages of inspiration! When I got hope and opened up to the first article, it was by Keri Anne from gingerlillytea. Her blog is centered around embracing and nurturing the lovely, enchanting side of childhood, finding the magic in all manner of things (which may as well be my own personal slogan, I love trying to find the magic in beautiful things as much as possible). Such sweet photos of picking fruit and dancing through fields on a sunset walk... Yet again I was reminded how I was losing my way and I was being shown that it is utterly attainable. I just have to shake off the anxiety and stress that I let cloud motherhood. Easier said than done, no?

But for these beautiful faces, I have to try.